OK....I got it licked (at least for now)!! I did everything suggested here with nothing, then I looked in the MemMaid forum, and someone posted pmClean:
http://www.pocketmax.net/redial.html
This removed a couple more duplicate notifications that not only got my alarms working, but for the longest time, MemMaid would not do a full quick clean, it would shut down during it, but now it is running great again!!!
pmClean is very basic, not much in the way of choices or customizing, but it worked, so it may be worth throwing on the memory card 'just in case'!!!