Edit: Sorry, missed that last point about ActiveSync not able to detect your phone. I guess this won't work then.
As long as you can connect via ActiveSync, this should work.
First connect via ActiveSync.
Run a program called MyMobiler on your PC (
http://www.mtux.com/)
After it's installed, you can see your phone screen on your PC. If not, right click on the tray icon on the bottom right of your PC screen and select Open Mobiler.
Hopefully you can then control your screen with your mouse and Select the Unlock button.
Hope that works.