Did the dcd rom load ok, but then the phone wouldn't start? If so, sounds like you did everything correctly, but missed a step. When you are stuck on the splash screen after an upgrade, you need to take the battery out for 30 seconds, then put it back in and do a hard reset (hold 2 soft keys and push soft reset button). Obviously, this is a very easy fix, and it sounds like you might have bigger problems, but I always like to try the easy solutions first.
