Thread: Ugh...need program to catch cheating spouse..
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Old 02-07-2008, 07:46 PM
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InvincibleLiving
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Why on earth did you ressurect this thread? ... it was doing just fine when it was dead and gone on page five of the forums....

The only thing that can shield you (anyone) from infidelity in your relationship is mutual maturity, respect, and integrity. I'm not saying that those three thing guarantee you not to experience getting cheated on or catching drama, but if YOU are operating in those three areas personally your odds greatly decrease of getting caught up in 'drama'.

Maturity means you understand that a relationship is about more than the 'hottest peice of @ss you can get with"... nuff said.

Respect means that you respect yourself and the other person enough to be real and upfront with how 'open' you want your relationship to be. Most of us guys at one point have all had "friends with benefits" on the side while already in relationship, or have otherwise just flat out cheated on our partner at the time. But it takes respect to realize that you cant hold up another person's life and feelings while you want to run the streets.

And finally there's integrity. It's the fundamental ingredient to any relationship. Women call it Trust but they usually fail to understand that dudes dont operate off of trust when in relationships. When a woman extends her trust to you and you're the one who's dirty, it allows a dude to put the "blame" more on her than himself. Dudes dont VALUE trust like women. But on the other hand, IF YOU operate with integrity, then YOUR actions and judgments cant be blamed on her placing her trust in you or not... you own up to and uphold the right actions and values cause it's on YOU.

Now.. to get integrity (if you dont already have it) -- and dont lie and say you do if you dont, cause that's defeating the whole purpose... sheesh -- you first need Maturity... see where I'm going with this?

Listen, I've known and loved my (now) wife for 5 years, but for 3.5 of those years i lacked all three of those items in our relationship. I cheated, slept around yada yada. But the I decided to grow up. I turned my life around, got my stuff together and married her 7 months ago today (on 07/07/07). The process has made me a different man.

The post above mine said this "there isnt a single girl out there that's worth the time and effort for us guys to pull our hair out and go crazy over..." in some ways he's right, because the one worth the time and the effort wont make you do that. Why? Because she's operating in the same three items i mentioned as well.

Real Talk.... Nautica2450
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