"How To" for custom ROM

[rtullier]

First of all, thanks to all those spending precious time helping with, and creating the custom ROMs. There is lots of info throughout this forum about "cooking" custom ROMs but it would be very helpful to those of us new to this process to find a concise guide.

Is there one definitive thread that describes the process of creating these custom ROMs in depth? There seem to be a lot of little "gotchas" to watch out for.

If I do "cook" a ROM (for myself), can I put in retail programs like Pocket Quicken or Voice Commander?

What's the difference in extended ROM and non-extended ROM? Are there limitations on what can go in each?

From the discussions, there doesn't seem to be just one tool (newbie here, so be kind) to use to create a ROM. I for one will offer up a donation toward the creation of a tool that would:
1. Offer check boxes for what to include in your custom ROM
2. Be (somewhat) idiot proof for those like me who will certainly screw it up if possible.
3. Create the whole thing just by clicking "Cook" or something to that effect.

Comments welcome and please excuse my newbie ignorance in any of the above.

Thanks again for all your hard work in furthering this technology.

rtullier