[itsall_cooool]

Hardware upgrades.

Memory: cannot be upgraded due to space/design limitations. This has been thoroughly researched. There is a thread in xda-developers regarding this. Search.
Front camera: again, where would you put it? And the additional connections to the boards would require extensiv modding
WiFi and bluetooth: Limited by the installed hardware.
32GB microSD: These have only recently been announced and will cost upwards of $600 bucks
Battery Cover with microSD storage: Probably the only doable upgrade you want.

Summary: Anyone who claims this can be done for even $2000 is pipe-dreaming. Besides all this would be no good without a larger vga screen. The device you seek isnt made by anyone yet and likely will be years before technology will meet your desires. Well, there is one made, but it's called a 'laptop'.