Natuica, I got it exactly how you like it. It was a series of a lot of installs/uninstalls, so hopefully this works for you.
Download this:
http://www.zombienexus.net/portal/up...tdialer2.5.CAB
Then soft reset. Your dialer will be plain white. Go into programs-advanced-shapp's advn panel and phone skin. DISABLE and soft reset.
Should look exactly how you want it.
[I actually installed the smart dialing, them big button mogul dialer which screwed it all up, uninstalled said dialer, then the advanced control panel, but I think you could avoid all that]
Let me know and tip those scales!
{edit including screenshot - i need a good screenshot utility, any recommendations?]