I went into the calendar settings and tried it the other way. I actually found an app that changes the notification sound and it's different than the sms sound. My sms sound isn't that loud but I need my calendar alarm to be. it's called 'calendar event' and I like it so far.
I couldn't get the default calendar to show my upcoming appointments, which is why I asked. I played around with it and searched but it's quite possible I missed it!
