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Sorry about the news.
I'm not sure about the Q, but does it have internal GPS? because if you can enable it, you can use programs like Sprite Terminator to track it.
Also, you can set it to 'Location On' so the phone won't notify her if you are tracking the phone.
Hope this helps. I also second the advice to start getting things together... Make sure you have all the financials secure, and get a lawyer to help you with you can keep from her. Slowly work your way towards security, and then drop the bomb. Make sure the kids understand, and make sure it is as easy as it can be on them.
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